ASMR, as misunderstood as it is loved, can provide a lifeline when face-to-face connection becomes non-existent.
By the time Melbourne entered its fifth lockdown in mid-2021, I knew what to expect – long days that would blend into one, with limited connection with family and friends. Some days my anxiety would spike, as I worried about what was happening in the world; yet felt unable to connect with people despite our ‘collective’ experience.
As we’ve found, the world can feel very divisive when challenges such as the pandemic arise. I backed away from social media, exhausted by the overload of opinions that filled the screen and the feelings of FOMO from looking at the photos from friends far away. Even the attempts at staying social through countless Zoom parties, WhatsApp group threads, social media posts, and phone calls soon felt overwhelming. In this catch-22 where I craved social connection but felt incapacitated by having to seek it, I turned to ASMR. Now, it sits in my wellbeing toolkit alongside regular counselling and self-care.
What is ASMR?
ASMR stands for autonomous sensory meridian response, and you may already know the tingly, soothing sensation even if you haven’t heard the term before. “Have you ever fallen asleep at the beach or at someone’s house with the warm chatter of people around you? It’s like that,” says US-based ASMR creator Ashley Marie of the calming sensation that comes from hearing certain sounds. ASMR videos, which usually feature the creator talking directly and close-up to their audience, have harnessed a sense of intimacy and connection that can be lacking – whether due to lockdown, or our more isolated lives.
If you think listening to someone whisper words of affirmation or softly chew their food sounds a bit out there, you’re not alone – while ASMR has many fans, it can also be misunderstood. “I think the misconceptions come from the fact that the concept of ASMR is something relatively new for a lot of people,” says Ashley. “When you first watch, it might seem strange if you don’t know the fundamentals of what ASMR is and the effect it can have on people.”
The growing trend of ASMR
Having heard about the growing trend from a friend, Ashley started watching videos and found they helped her relax and fall asleep. In 2016, she set up the Ashley Marie ASMR channel, which now has over 134,000 subscribers from around the globe. “The soothing background noise of ASMR helps drown out my racing thoughts,” she explains. “For many people, including myself, ASMR gives a euphoric feeling of relaxation, similar to having your hair played with or getting a massage. I struggle with anxiety and have trouble sleeping, so ASMR has had a great impact in my everyday life.”
I had enjoyed ASMR videos long before the initial lockdown of 2020, but it’s not surprising that I have become a more avid viewer since the pandemic started. Stuck at home alone, my thoughts racing and heart rate increasing, I’ve gone from panicky to relaxed in the span of a video. A 2018 study published in the Public Library of Science Journal titled ‘More than a feeling’ found that ASMR videos “regulate emotion and may have therapeutic benefit for those that experience ASMR; for example, reducing heart rate and promoting feelings of positive affect and interpersonal connection.”
While a pencil scratching a pad of paper or nails tapping on an object can also illicit those tingles, the most popular triggers tend to be direct-to-camera personal attention. “Many ASMR videos, especially roleplays, are aimed at comforting the viewer,” says Ashley. “This personal attention makes us feel relaxed, calm and cared for. I’ve done videos such as ‘Taking Care of You While Sick’, ‘Relaxing Facial’, and ‘Positive Affirmations’ – ASMR videos can make you feel like you’re actually there chatting with a friend or getting a facial at a spa.”
When neither spa days nor friendship catch-ups were possible, these virtual performances filled in for the real thing. “We weren’t able to go out and do activities or be with people for a long while, but I believe being able to watch videos that are so positive and personal has helped us have some form of human connection through our screens,” says Ashley.
And they even helped encourage in-person interaction where possible. “I got the sweetest comment the other day from a father who said that he and his son followed along with one of my ASMR cooking videos and they ended up making a beautiful father-son day from it – that made my day,” she says. “It feels great knowing that my videos have helped people even in the slightest way.”
WORDS: Samantha Allemann
